Sadest Day Ever....

On Friday afternoon, we had to put our beautiful, amazing, loving dog Chewy down. We have had her since she was a puppy, and have loved having her as part of the family for the past 13 years. Just over a year ago we found a lump under her fur. Vet told us with her age, she would most likely not survive a surgery, to take her home & enjoy her. Now she had 6 lumps & little growths on top of her fur.

With everything the neighbors do, kicking the fence & yelling at the dogs has definatly put them both under stress these past 8 months.  They have both become way more jumpy, their hair loss has more than tripled. It's just frustrating that this stress kind of sped up the process. For people that claim we are bad dog owners, they sure don't know how to treat animals.

That aside, she was old, and this past week she started to act very different.  We have had her since before we had our kids, so both Chewy & Wes have grown up being loved, cuddled, and yes pulled on by babies little hands on their cute soft ears & their constantly wagging tails.  They have an amazing temperment & a wonderful tollerance for little kids. Ella loves her puppies, hugging them with all her might....but this past week, Chewy would growl at her when she hugged just a little too tight. She would stake her territory around the kitchen table at meal times & Wes, or anyone else came near her, she'd freak out barking/growling.  We had been told that sometimes dogs show they are in pain by their attitude change... she even snapped at Tyler & I too....she had never done that before. We knew it was time. Oh my gosh that is the hardest thing I think I have ever done. I pre-arranged with Zach & Brae's teachers/school, that they would stay home on Friday, so they could have the day with her. We made her scrambled eggs (her favorite treat), the kids gave them tons of dog biscuits, and just spent the day holding/hugging her. The sun was even out, giving her a chance to do her favorite thing...lay along the back fence, sleeping in the sunshine. Lots of pics were taken, and so many tears were shed (and still are).

When I tried to tell Ella that Chewy was sick, she exclaimed, "Chewy not sick, she all better!!!" and cried. If she sees me crying, she yells at me to "stop crying Momma" and stays upset until I stop crying. When Ty came home from the vet, she ran to the door, squeeling, "Chewy!", but when she didn't see her...ran to Brae & told him, "Chewy's not coming back."

Connor went into denial mode. We told the boys on Thursday night. When I reminded him that he might want to hug her just a little more, he said "No, I don't want to. Can I play my DS?" When Tyler left with Chewy on Friday, that's when he finally let himself grieve, just sobbing. He said he "wished the medicine would make her all better, not make her go to sleep forever, but I'm glad my twin has a puppy now." Yes Connor, now your twin has a chance to have a dog too, she'll be taken care of. He made sure he took pictures of her on his camera too, so he could remember her.

Braeden, sweet, kind-hearted Braeden.......he took it the hardest. He hasn't stopped crying since we told him. You see, Brae has this amazing way with animals. Both Chewy & Wes adore him - the dogs both get so excited when he comes home from school, and without fail, every time Brae was on the floor, those dogs were both on him...thinking they were lap dogs :). He misses her terribly, and when Tyler left with Chewy, he told me he wanted to die so he could be in Heaven with her. That just broke my heart. It's not that he really wants to die, he just wants her here with him. When he was 1, we were in Disneyland & took the kids to Build-a-Bear. Of all the disney things he could have adorned his pet of choice....he chose a beagle that looked like Chewy, and named her "Chewy Puppy".  Even at 1 he loved her so much. Brae has requested pictures of Chewy in his room, so I'll be making the kids posters of them with both dogs for their rooms :).

Zach, a rock for his younger siblings. He is such a sensitive kid, amazing heart that he wears on his sleeve. Zach has been our pooper-scooper for the past 2 years, taking it over when my back went out & it became his chore. He almost never complained about doing that chore. And on most mornings, beats me downstairs & I find that he's already fed them. He's an awesome kid. He has been with her almost as long as Tyler & I...and they totally obey him. They come to him when called, stop getting into things when caught....He's been amazing.

Tyler & I....well, we try not to break down in front of the kids...but it's hard, really hard. I didn't want to let her go, but felt like I would have been selfish to keep her alive. You could tell she knew...that it was time. Last night was rough. Tyler took her in, stayed with her until she was gone. As he told me about it, he just broke down. He did for the rest of us, what we couldn't do. He's an amazing husband/father/pet owner.

At first I thought Wes was doing ok....a little confused, but ok.  He paced a little, but I think he was loving all the attention he no longer had to share with Chewy.  Then we went to bed, having stayed up until midnight with him.  As I got ready in our bathroom, I heard him crying from the laundry room. That has to be the saddest sound I have ever heard. Neither of our dogs have ever done that.  So I grabbed my pillow & headed downstairs, got him out of the laundry room from his crate he sleeps in.....and he & I laid on the floor until after 2am.  Then he jumped up, walked to the front door, as if he was waiting for Chewy to walk back in.  Then he went and checked their crate........and stood ever so still.....trying to hear her footsteps. Oh Wes, I am so sorry...how hard it must be to have lost your sister. (They are from the same litter).

Chewy, we love you, we desperately miss you. You were such an adorable dog. Those tiny puppy teeth marks and chewed up corner of my bed are things I cherish now....I miss you snuggling under the covers with us & waking up to you on my pillow. I am so grateful the last night we had you, that you snuggled right between Ty & I, as if you knew we needed that. We love you.